When your ex turns blackmailer

Blackmail by an ex-partner is one of the most emotionally devastating experiences a person can face. Whether it involves threatening to share private photos, expose personal secrets, or spread damaging information, the abuse is real — and so are your options.

If someone is blackmailing you — whether an ex or anyone else — the first and most important thing is this: stay calm. Panic leads to poor decisions. Knowledge leads to protection.

Here is exactly what you should do.

1. Do not give in to their demands
This is the most critical step. Paying money or agreeing to any demand does not make the problem go away — it makes it worse. Once a blackmailer knows their threat works, they will come back again and again. Compliance only fuels the cycle.

2. Save every piece of evidence
Do not delete anything. Screenshot every message, save call records, and preserve every piece of communication. These are your legal weapons. Even content that feels embarrassing or humiliating must be kept — investigators and courts need the full picture to build a case against the perpetrator.

3. Cut off contact — but after saving evidence
Block the person across all platforms, but only after you have secured your evidence. Cutting contact removes their direct line of pressure and signals that their tactics are not working.

4. File a report with the police
In Bangladesh, blackmail is a punishable offence under the Digital Security Act 2018. Visit your nearest police station and file a General Diary (GD) or a formal case. Do not feel ashamed — you are the victim, and the law is on your side.

5. Report to the cybercrime unit
If the blackmail involves digital content — messages, photos, or online threats — report it directly to the Bangladesh Police Cyber Crime Unit at cybercrime.gov.bd or call the national helpline 999. Cybercrime authorities are trained to handle these cases with discretion and urgency.

6. Tell someone you trust
Do not carry this alone. Reach out to a family member or a close, trusted friend. Having someone in your corner provides emotional support and can also help you take the next steps more confidently. Isolation is exactly what a blackmailer wants.

7. Seek mental health support
Being blackmailed — especially by someone who once knew you intimately — is deeply traumatic. It is completely normal to feel fear, shame, or anxiety. If you are struggling, speak to a counsellor or mental health professional. Your emotional wellbeing matters just as much as the legal battle.

Being blackmailed is never your fault. The shame belongs entirely to the person making the threats — not to you. Reach out, speak up, and take action. You are not alone, and the law is firmly on your side.